Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Should Paparazzi Become the Next Most Dangerous Game?


In his short story The Most Dangerous Game, Richard Connell presents a dark tale critiquing human nature. What is a man to do when all primal pleasures seem to have lost appeal? Why hunt other men for sport, no less. Game is a tale of struggle and decadence, David versus Goliath, you know what I am talking about. You read the story in fifth grade, or you watched the movie. Needless to say the premise of one man hunting another for sport is a deeply disturbing image, partly because in many ways it is very plausible.

This is why the Paparazzi offend me so much. They actively "hunt" celebrities, in the hopes of getting that "perfect" photograph. You know which one I am talking about, the photograph on the cover of some scandal magazine. I know consumers are a part of the problem as well, everytime you pick up Star or the Enquirer to see what trouble Bennifer the Sequel are getting into you are feeding the Paparazzi frenzy.

I bring this up because it appears that Lindsey Lohan has been in another car accident, and once again the Paparazzi seem to be a part of the cause. Even with the new law protecting celebrities by allowing them to sue photographers for up to triple the amount of damage in an "assault," the Paparazzi are hammering away at Lohan. Maybe you are like me and uninterested in Lohan as a general rule. Sure Mean Girls was good and her Herbie movie was a return to the classic formula, but for the most part the teenie-pop artist doesn't interest me at all. What does interest me is how aggressive the Paparazzi are with her. I guess causing one car crash isn't enough.

Since the new law may not be having the effect we want, let me propose an alternative. In The Most Dangerous Game the protagonist is a big game hunter who becomes the big game prey. Why don't we pass a MDG Law where we sell Paparazzi tags? You and I take our Shotguns into Beverly Hills and wait for the Paparazzi to strike and when they do...Bang! Bag 'em and rack 'em. At least that would make it a challenge for the Paparazzi.

Or maybe, just maybe, some of the actors could hire P.I.s to look into the background of some of their "adoring fans" and use their PR machine to give personal information about who is stalking them. I wonder how cameraman X would feel if a bunch of angry fan club members, or a Kathy Bates type from Misery, were to come knockin' on his door.

Better yet, we could as consumers realize that the "lives" actors portray on the screen are the ones they want public and be satisfied with those. Leave the gossip where it belongs, in the trash.

UPDATE According to the LA Times the Paparazzi may have only been involved after the accident. It is possible that Lohan fled her vehicle without communicating with the drive of the vehicle she hit. Hm...fleeing the scene?

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