Wow... this one hit me pretty hard this morning. I guess part of it is, my mom actually passed about two weeks and change before yours -- September 22, 1998. That... and I found out by answering machine as well... and her death came from the results of her own addiction (my mother was a very heavy smoker). She was a manic-depressive, and I suppose in part she was self-medicating -- who could really say, though, since she's not here to ask. In any case, I understand how the grief can be. God bless.
As an addict in recovery, I can tell you that addiction is both a disease AND a decision. As addicts, we DO have an affliction, but we also have the choice of whether or not to engage in our addictive behaviors, whatever they might be. However, the level of our ability to effectively choose NOT to engage in our addictive behaviors, is defined by a number number of factors, including (a) genes, (b) the way we are raised as children, (c) our history of trauma, (d) commitment to a program of recovery and (e) a number of socioeconomic factors that make "good decision-making" more difficult.
Of course, none of this make the death of a loved one any easier to process, regardless of whether or not they were an addict. I'm just do glad that you do not blame your mother, because I can guarantee you whatever she did or did not do, NO human being comes out of the womb hoping to become an addict. My prayers to you and all of your family, and may God continue to bless you and your wife.
Wow... this one hit me pretty hard this morning. I guess part of it is, my mom actually passed about two weeks and change before yours -- September 22, 1998. That... and I found out by answering machine as well... and her death came from the results of her own addiction (my mother was a very heavy smoker). She was a manic-depressive, and I suppose in part she was self-medicating -- who could really say, though, since she's not here to ask. In any case, I understand how the grief can be. God bless.
God bless you too and thank you for sharing.
😢
As an addict in recovery, I can tell you that addiction is both a disease AND a decision. As addicts, we DO have an affliction, but we also have the choice of whether or not to engage in our addictive behaviors, whatever they might be. However, the level of our ability to effectively choose NOT to engage in our addictive behaviors, is defined by a number number of factors, including (a) genes, (b) the way we are raised as children, (c) our history of trauma, (d) commitment to a program of recovery and (e) a number of socioeconomic factors that make "good decision-making" more difficult.
Of course, none of this make the death of a loved one any easier to process, regardless of whether or not they were an addict. I'm just do glad that you do not blame your mother, because I can guarantee you whatever she did or did not do, NO human being comes out of the womb hoping to become an addict. My prayers to you and all of your family, and may God continue to bless you and your wife.
🫶