Thursday, September 15, 2005

Ordnung! Ordnung! Ordnung! You must look efficient, rooselessly and coldly efficient.

According to the Associated Press:

Germans were ordered Thursday to stay serious when having their photographs taken for new passports, wiping away any grins, smirks or smiles so that biometric scanners can pick up their facial features.


You read that correctly, Germans are prohibited from smiling in Driver's License photos to make it so security devices can correctly identify them. You may think that this is bizarre, or even restrictive. You would be wrong.

Anyone who has seen Aquirre: The Wrath of God or Schultze Gets the Blues knows that the natural emotional state of the German people is dour and humorless. Since Germans don't smile, except when they emigrate to America, the sophisticated biometric scanners would be baffled and unable to identify the features of any smiling Goths.

Oh, and don't let that silhouette with a "jump in his step" on the cover of Schultze fool you, only a German could consider that film a light-hearted, fast-paced, comedy.

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